Lift Up, Don’t One Up

I am a very competitive person. On the first half of my career it was very helpful as I was an aspiring sales person that strived and achieved #1 sales person in the company accolades multiple times. This resulted in several promotions into management. However, it appeared that the higher I rose the more that my intense competitive nature became a liability instead of an asset. My employees were not always interested in being hyper competitive, and my intensity could turn off other executives in a board room.

It had become imperative that I shift my competitive mind set in business to an internal competitiveness with a more laid back and supportive exterior. I also decided to adjust my circle of friends to those that lift each other up. This was much different then my friends from college that I was very competitive with, where one upping each other was part of the vibe.

I am blessed to still be friends with my buddies from college, but on a recent visit from one of my best friends it took very little time for us to regress into ultra competitive behavior that from my perspective is borderline toxic. It is very eye opening to see in real time the intensity that other executives had labeled me as being a hinderance.

I hate to admit that they were right, and I have made great strides to change my behavior regardless of the backslide that occurred from my recent buddy’s visit. I have to say that I like myself and appreciate my new friends that are much more supportive. So if possible, please focus on lifting people up and not one upping those you care about most. It will definitely make you more happy, and may make you more successful too.